Recently I was asked, “Is there a song that has changed you? A song that speaks to you on another level?” Well…as a music therapist in a hospital setting, I work a lot with songs. Songs, and music in general, are a great modality to help people manage the emotional distress of devastating illness, especially in cancer care. Songs are great as they can speak for us when we can’t find the words. They can provide empathy and comfort. And they can help with resolve, especially for someone who has gotten to the point of preparing to finally let go.
I have shared many songs with people who are suffering or hurting, and I’ve shared many songs with those who are at the end of their lives. Meaningful songs, for them…and inevitably, meaningful songs for me too. There are so many songs that I now associate with those I’ve had the pleasure of working with who are no longer here. Songs that helped them in their journeys. Songs that helped them find the resolve to let go and move on to what comes next after this world. And when I hear those songs, randomly on the radio, or at Target, or wherever, I immediately think of them. For me, those songs are no longer mine. They are now “our” songs.
However, the song that stands out the most to me is “Let It Be.” It is perhaps the most perfect song for finding resolve and acceptance. And here is the exact moment when I realized that “Let It Be” became the song that has changed my life the most.
Two years ago, I finally got to see Paul McCartney, live, in concert. It was a “bucket list” moment for me (to see a Beatle live) that was finally fulfilled. And it was one of the best and most emotional concerts I have ever experienced.
At almost 80 years old (at the time), Sir Paul had performed nonstop for three hours. And he sounded great. I could not believe that I was there, that I was actually in the same building as a Beatle. A true, once-in-a-lifetime experience for me. As I reflect on that concert two years ago, I can still easily remember how that experience became such a profound moment for me—meaningful in an emotional, almost spiritual way. Like many, the Beatles’ music speaks to me on another level. And as a music therapist, I use the Beatles’ songs more than just about anything else. They’re especially resonant in cancer care. The songs and lyrics are so poignant, emotionally layered, and timeless. I discover something new and grow a deeper appreciation for the brevity and Emotional intelligence of their music every day. So many of their songs are perfect as a vehicle for emotional expression and an outlet for those reflecting on life and mortality. The patients I work with connect to that music, to themselves, and to something seemingly on a higher level.
I can still remember, toward the end of the concert, when Paul sat down at the piano and sang “Let It Be.” Something happened that I don’t think I will ever forget. I remember feeling a sudden surge of almost uncontrollable and unexpected emotions wash over me. It took me by complete surprise and it’s still vivid in my mind today. Everyone around me was singing and smiling as I tried not to become a bubbling mess. It took everything I had to hold it together. What was that?
Well…I think, at that moment, everything just hit me all at once. I was suddenly thinking about life—my life, the people in my life, and…music. I was thinking about the sheer power of music that I experience and that amazes me in my work every day. And I also thought about all the patients I’ve worked with and the music that we’ve shared—music that helped bring some comfort when they were hurting the most.
“Let It Be” fits so poignantly with those who are struggling to come to terms with acceptance and are preparing for what comes next. Those coming to terms with having to, well…finally let it be. For so many, this was the last song we shared together. And in that moment, two years ago, amongst the crowd, the singing, the beautiful night sky, the collective joy of the audience and performer as one, I thought about all of those I worked with and shared music with who are now gone. In that very moment, my emotional world all came together and just exploded. I felt a mix of sorrow and joy. Longing and validation. I’m not religious, but that moment was…a religious experience.
But I think what I felt most in that moment was connection. Connection to myself, connection to those close to me, connection to my work, and connection to those who are now gone. I felt connection on a higher level. And I felt the true power of music. Honestly, I felt the true power of music like I’ve never really felt before. I don’t want to say that that moment changed me, but it was a true mind-body-spirit experience.
So now, every time I hear this song or sing this song, I feel so much. I feel celebration. I feel melancholy. I feel all the emotions of the world. But what I mostly feel is lucky. Lucky that I was able to bring music to so many who needed something…to help with resolve, to help with comfort, to help them prepare to finally let it be. And I feel lucky that I get to be a part of the true healing power of music for so many who need it the most. Including me.
So, to Sir Paul…thank you. Thank you for speaking words of wisdom. And helping us all when we need to…let it be.
The healing power of music…